How can it be possible that I have just 4 days left of my first semester of college?!
I think time goes by faster as I get older...and that kind of scares me because I feel like one day I will wake up and I'll be 60 and think where the heck did my life go?!
So, though this will not be a long blog, let me leave you all with a simple message.
When someone tells you that life is short they really mean it. So take risks, have fun, love everyone, and don't put off being the person you want to be until tomorrow because tomorrow is too late!
So now I am going to take my own advice....
I am going to drink a few diet cokes, watch some happy Christmas movies, and hammer some history into my brain for the final tomorrow at 8 am!
College fellows: Good luck on your exams :)
P.S. Better, more entertaining blogs to follow once this week has come to a close!
Monday, December 12, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Elephants
Sometimes when I'm alone in my room I start to just jump and dance around. And then I remember that anyone walking from the North Hedges parking lot would be able to clearly see me being an idiot.
Sometimes I spend hours watching romantic music videos on youtube. And then I realize that if I didn't spend so much time watching these videos I may have my very own love life to account for.
Sometimes I get excited about how happy jolly ranchers make me. And then when it's time for me to go out in public I look in the mirror only to see a blackish tongue.
Sometimes I put off studying, homework, and papers until the night before (actually, I always do it...but for poetic sake...). And then I have a mini brain annurisum/nervous breakdown when it's 1 am and I have to crank out breathhtaking intelligence in 6 hours.
Sometimes I think it's a good idea to be a professional creeper on Facebook. And then I get a virtual slap in the face when I find out things I never wanted to know.
Sometimes I write blogs that describe how ridiculous I am. And then the whole world knows to stay away from the crazy sparkle girl. Haha.
Sometimes I spend hours watching romantic music videos on youtube. And then I realize that if I didn't spend so much time watching these videos I may have my very own love life to account for.
Sometimes I get excited about how happy jolly ranchers make me. And then when it's time for me to go out in public I look in the mirror only to see a blackish tongue.
Sometimes I put off studying, homework, and papers until the night before (actually, I always do it...but for poetic sake...). And then I have a mini brain annurisum/nervous breakdown when it's 1 am and I have to crank out breathhtaking intelligence in 6 hours.
Sometimes I think it's a good idea to be a professional creeper on Facebook. And then I get a virtual slap in the face when I find out things I never wanted to know.
Sometimes I write blogs that describe how ridiculous I am. And then the whole world knows to stay away from the crazy sparkle girl. Haha.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Yes, I'm Aware I'm Going Crazy
Strawberry flavored ghost dots...LIARS.
Orange fruit snacks...LIARS.
Blue shock tart at the end of the package...LIARS.
Maybe my problem is that I'm relying on candy to foretell my future. Maybe my problem is that I'm desperate enough to let candy foretell my future.
I hope I'm not crazy and that I'm not the only one who does this.
Have you ever had something that drives you so crazy that you start making bargains with yourself?
"If the next car that passes me is a truck I will get an A on my History exam."
When the next car that passes you is a truck you get so excited and a major confidence boost.
When the next car that passes you is a mini van you tell yourself that those little bargains are just fake anyways and that it doesn't matter, you can still get an A.
Well I have been making these bargains with candy for the past month and a half...for the same thing. And each time it's what I want.
"If the next ghost dot I eat is strawberry flavored..."
"If there are no orange fruit snacks in this pack...."
"If the last shock tart in this package is blue..."
Each time the dot is strawberry, each time there's no orange fruit snacks, each time that shock tart is blue.
But as time goes on I can more clearly see every day that what I'm bargaining with candy for isn't even worth this obsessing.
No matter what the candy tells me, I know that it's wrong. I don't want it to be wrong. I want this so bad. But if the candy were right wouldn't things be set right by now? I guess I didn't give the candy a time limit.
Maybe over time it would be...but now I need to decide if it's even worth it.
.........
Sadly, I don't think so.
Orange fruit snacks...LIARS.
Blue shock tart at the end of the package...LIARS.
Maybe my problem is that I'm relying on candy to foretell my future. Maybe my problem is that I'm desperate enough to let candy foretell my future.
I hope I'm not crazy and that I'm not the only one who does this.
Have you ever had something that drives you so crazy that you start making bargains with yourself?
"If the next car that passes me is a truck I will get an A on my History exam."
When the next car that passes you is a truck you get so excited and a major confidence boost.
When the next car that passes you is a mini van you tell yourself that those little bargains are just fake anyways and that it doesn't matter, you can still get an A.
Well I have been making these bargains with candy for the past month and a half...for the same thing. And each time it's what I want.
"If the next ghost dot I eat is strawberry flavored..."
"If there are no orange fruit snacks in this pack...."
"If the last shock tart in this package is blue..."
Each time the dot is strawberry, each time there's no orange fruit snacks, each time that shock tart is blue.
But as time goes on I can more clearly see every day that what I'm bargaining with candy for isn't even worth this obsessing.
No matter what the candy tells me, I know that it's wrong. I don't want it to be wrong. I want this so bad. But if the candy were right wouldn't things be set right by now? I guess I didn't give the candy a time limit.
Maybe over time it would be...but now I need to decide if it's even worth it.
.........
Sadly, I don't think so.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Freshman 15
It has been ages since I last did this! How sad, but now that I am back to it I am hoping to get a little more frequent again. Anyways! Since I have been running low on inspiration lately, I'm making another list.
Fifteen Fun Facts About Freshman Year (So Far)
1. It is much harder to wake up for an 8 am class now than it was last year.
2. Procrastination is a lifelong disease that cannot be cured.
3. Working out at a gym is much more productive than working out at home. No one is around to judge me if I take a "break" at home. At the gym ya gotta power through or risk looking like an out of shape lazy waste of a human.
4. Don't buy fridges from Wal-Mart. They randomly shut off about 4 times a day, so all you can keep in there is Diet Dr. Pepper and Propels.
5. Finding a bestie from your most miserable class makes it a lot more bearable.
6. Not every weekend is a party....i.e.: I spent last Saturday night eating Taco Bell alone in my car in a parking lot and driving around Bozeman singing to Taylor Swift...yeah I know....haha.
7. Just because the cafeteria has delightful sprinkle donuts every morning does not make it okay to eat them every morning.
8. Cards, money, and care packages from Momma and Daddy and Sissy make life swell :)
9. Facebook sees me about 40 hours a week. I think they need to pay me for being so loyal.
10. Being 20 minutes away from a beautiful big sister, a pretty little niece, free laundry, and a lovely home cooked meal is fabulous.
11. My roommate is lovely!
12. Be careful who you develop creepy crushes on from afar. The world is smaller than you think. It could turn out to be the most awkward thing ever when you realize who they really are....I won't elaborate.
13. Just because you're in college, does not mean you will suddenly develop sophisticated old people taste. Don't bring black coffee to class hoping that you'll suddenly like it. You'll be wishing for a gallon of creamer after the first taste. Yuck.
14. Wal-mart, Taco Bell, and Facebook creeping are all great things to add into an all nighter.
15. ...I miss my hula hoops....
Monday, August 22, 2011
This is not the end, this is not the beginning!
So here we are.
The summer has quickly ended and I can easily say it was the best summer of my life (so far :)). I met so many amazing new people, made new friends, found new hope with boys, and learned to appreciate my amazing family and home so much more.
I remember exactly three months ago I was sitting in my room in Sunburst, still not completely packed to leave, and thinking...this is it. Well, here I am again...sitting in a new room, a new home....still not completely packed to leave... This is it...
Now prepare yourself...here comes in corny, sentimental Ronnie.
No matter who we are or where we've been, we almost always try to plan for life and predict the future. But if we would just stop planning and predicting for a few moments we could truly see how beautiful our lives already are. I never could have imagined anything that happened this summer three months ago. Not a single thing...but I wouldn't have changed anything that happened for the world! Although it's only been three months...I feel like I'm getting closer and closer to the person I want to be every day.
So, thanks, God, for:
My two beautiful sisters/best friends
Having a fabulous place and fabulous people to live with this summer
The amazing friends I have been able to stay in touch with
The new people I met :)
Random bursts of spontaneity that led to the crazy, fun memories
A BEAUTIFUL and healthy new niece
Keeping my other BEAUTIFUL princess healthy
The best parents I could possibly ask for
And for keeping the bright, sparkling future a secret from impatient little me
I think it's good to not know how cold the water is...just jump in!
<3<3<3
The summer has quickly ended and I can easily say it was the best summer of my life (so far :)). I met so many amazing new people, made new friends, found new hope with boys, and learned to appreciate my amazing family and home so much more.
I remember exactly three months ago I was sitting in my room in Sunburst, still not completely packed to leave, and thinking...this is it. Well, here I am again...sitting in a new room, a new home....still not completely packed to leave... This is it...
Now prepare yourself...here comes in corny, sentimental Ronnie.
No matter who we are or where we've been, we almost always try to plan for life and predict the future. But if we would just stop planning and predicting for a few moments we could truly see how beautiful our lives already are. I never could have imagined anything that happened this summer three months ago. Not a single thing...but I wouldn't have changed anything that happened for the world! Although it's only been three months...I feel like I'm getting closer and closer to the person I want to be every day.
So, thanks, God, for:
My two beautiful sisters/best friends
Having a fabulous place and fabulous people to live with this summer
The amazing friends I have been able to stay in touch with
The new people I met :)
Random bursts of spontaneity that led to the crazy, fun memories
A BEAUTIFUL and healthy new niece
Keeping my other BEAUTIFUL princess healthy
The best parents I could possibly ask for
And for keeping the bright, sparkling future a secret from impatient little me
I think it's good to not know how cold the water is...just jump in!
<3<3<3
Friday, August 19, 2011
Dual bloggo with Brooketha AKA Blog of Parentheses
We're sittin' on the couch (Brooke's brown microsuede couch in the basement). Brooke's just finished her homework(for the night, folks. Don't get too impressed). Veronica just returned from a girlfriend date at Sonic (where Brooke was not welcome....uh!). Our plan is to do Just Dance! Summer Party for the first time (Jeremy only bought it for Brooke a month and a half ago...NBD).
We shopped with Mom today (at many places, but Wally World stands out.) There were two sisters shopping with their mom in the grocery section (the freezer aisles). They were CAH-REEEEEPIN! (Why? We don't know.)
Our possible explanations? 1. We look like twins. (Twins are sometimes interesting, case and point, Carol and Colleen. I'd stare at them...)
2. They thought we were Taylor Swift and Carrie Underwood. (We get confused for them a lot. A LOT.)
3. We had globs of ABC gum on our butts. (Which might be a problem since Veronica was wearing a short dress today. Ask mom. It was short.)
4. We reminded them of their third grade teacher. (We are teachers, they had teachers...it's a legit connection.)
5. (and this one is definitely most likely) We are beautiful.
At the beginning of this summer we had a large agenda (okay, we'll be honest...we wrote out a color coded contract and legally SIGNED them with our blood (just kidding...just a pretty marker)) of activities to accomplish before Veronica left for college. Some of these activities included:
a. Going for nightly walks (except for when it's raining, smells weird outside, when Cody and Riley just aren't having it with the neighborhood canines, or when we are being stalked by the paparazzi....which happened often, of course)
b. Just Dance EVERY day (except the days we wake up late, have to work, or need a drink of water)
c. Salad for lunch and dinner (we ran into a few lovely manager's specials at Smiths with the lettuce) daily (except for when the lettuce has little brown spots on it, when we are out of ranch, or when the house is fully stocked with starbursts and wheat thins)
d. Plan and do fun activities (except for when Teen Mom, The Bachelorette, Keeping Up With the Kardashians, The Glee Project, and Quilt in a Day are on....yes Veronica resorted to watching an old lady talk about quilts with Brooke on at least one occasion.)
So...since we are such busy girls and all of these exceptions kept blocking our path to awesome productive summerness....here we sit at the end of the summer having accomplished none of them (we DID however, become aunties again to a beautiful new niece! Remember, we are the queens of excuses...? :)). (double chin smile...we didn't eat enough salad) :))
Here is our list of activities for next summer:
1. Start a dessert business. Brookie's Cookies and Ron Ron's Bon Bons (we're taking requests for our first products! Maybe a bon bon cookie? Or a cookie bon bon?)
2. Travel to each of the seven wonders of the world in a self-navigated hot air balloon (with rainbows and sparkles on it, of course)
3. Writing more of these dual blogs (aren't we HILARIOUS!?) :))
4. Buy a slip-n-slide and host neighborhood slippy parties (you don't have to actually live in the neighborhood to attend...but the maximum occupancy will be 1000 so it's gonna fill up fast...)
5. Rent an inflatable bouncy house to live in for a couple days (not even kidding...that one would be fun)
6. Do our "twin for a day" experiment (tally and record the data into an Excel spreadsheet)
7. Start an ostrich farm (they have big eggs).
Well, we've succeeded at our number one success for the summer: procrastination.( We're still sitting on the brown microsuede couch...you didn't think we were typing this while dancing, did you?) We'll stop getting a kick out of ourselves (we've burst into laughter about our wittyness approximately 16 times during the composition of this blog) and being lazy and get to dancin' now.
(We're doing Firework by Katy Perry first.)
This is the best picture we could get in a series of about 9 shots. (You can see the Carrie Underwood/Taylor Swift resemblance here, huh?)
We shopped with Mom today (at many places, but Wally World stands out.) There were two sisters shopping with their mom in the grocery section (the freezer aisles). They were CAH-REEEEEPIN! (Why? We don't know.)
Our possible explanations? 1. We look like twins. (Twins are sometimes interesting, case and point, Carol and Colleen. I'd stare at them...)
2. They thought we were Taylor Swift and Carrie Underwood. (We get confused for them a lot. A LOT.)
3. We had globs of ABC gum on our butts. (Which might be a problem since Veronica was wearing a short dress today. Ask mom. It was short.)
4. We reminded them of their third grade teacher. (We are teachers, they had teachers...it's a legit connection.)
5. (and this one is definitely most likely) We are beautiful.
At the beginning of this summer we had a large agenda (okay, we'll be honest...we wrote out a color coded contract and legally SIGNED them with our blood (just kidding...just a pretty marker)) of activities to accomplish before Veronica left for college. Some of these activities included:
a. Going for nightly walks (except for when it's raining, smells weird outside, when Cody and Riley just aren't having it with the neighborhood canines, or when we are being stalked by the paparazzi....which happened often, of course)
b. Just Dance EVERY day (except the days we wake up late, have to work, or need a drink of water)
c. Salad for lunch and dinner (we ran into a few lovely manager's specials at Smiths with the lettuce) daily (except for when the lettuce has little brown spots on it, when we are out of ranch, or when the house is fully stocked with starbursts and wheat thins)
d. Plan and do fun activities (except for when Teen Mom, The Bachelorette, Keeping Up With the Kardashians, The Glee Project, and Quilt in a Day are on....yes Veronica resorted to watching an old lady talk about quilts with Brooke on at least one occasion.)
So...since we are such busy girls and all of these exceptions kept blocking our path to awesome productive summerness....here we sit at the end of the summer having accomplished none of them (we DID however, become aunties again to a beautiful new niece! Remember, we are the queens of excuses...? :)). (double chin smile...we didn't eat enough salad) :))
Here is our list of activities for next summer:
1. Start a dessert business. Brookie's Cookies and Ron Ron's Bon Bons (we're taking requests for our first products! Maybe a bon bon cookie? Or a cookie bon bon?)
2. Travel to each of the seven wonders of the world in a self-navigated hot air balloon (with rainbows and sparkles on it, of course)
3. Writing more of these dual blogs (aren't we HILARIOUS!?) :))
4. Buy a slip-n-slide and host neighborhood slippy parties (you don't have to actually live in the neighborhood to attend...but the maximum occupancy will be 1000 so it's gonna fill up fast...)
5. Rent an inflatable bouncy house to live in for a couple days (not even kidding...that one would be fun)
6. Do our "twin for a day" experiment (tally and record the data into an Excel spreadsheet)
7. Start an ostrich farm (they have big eggs).
Well, we've succeeded at our number one success for the summer: procrastination.( We're still sitting on the brown microsuede couch...you didn't think we were typing this while dancing, did you?) We'll stop getting a kick out of ourselves (we've burst into laughter about our wittyness approximately 16 times during the composition of this blog) and being lazy and get to dancin' now.
(We're doing Firework by Katy Perry first.)
Monday, August 15, 2011
Baby, Baby, Baby, OOOOOOH!
Ronnie Gillund's Day Off
Once upon a time Ronnie woke up with the intent of having a lovely, productive day. That did not happen. Here's why:
A new 100 color eyeshadow thing that caused her to spend 20 minutes layering colors upon colors on her eyelids.
Creedence Clearwater Revival Pandora Radio ended up being extremely enjoyable.
Her computer freaked out and took an hour to restore itself to its factory settings.
While she was waiting for the computer to restore she decided to paint her nails and toes with the new nail polishes she got on Saturday. The colors are named: 24/7, pinky glitter, hottie, and savage.
Facebook takes a long time to upload photos from her summer. Which consisted of the first week of June and the first week of August...her camera was broken between those dates because she dropped it in Central Park.
She ate a few fun size candy bars.
She then was left alone and so instead of beginning productivity she decided to take a 15 minute nap....which turned into an hour and a half nap...
She discovered the Glee version of tap tap revenge on her ipod.
Justin Bieber Pandora Radio ended up being dancalicious and she danced in the kitchen for a while.
Then she sat down to write this blog.
The end. :) <3
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Ya Taste Like Whiskey When Ya Kiss Me, Oh! I'd Give Anything Again to Be Your Baby Doll!
Beings as I'm leaving for college within the next two weeks, I'm sure many of you are expecting yet another deep, moving, philosophical blog. Not happening tonight. Tonight you get a list :)
My Favorites from the Past Two Months
- Beautiful Haylie Marie :)
- Trip to Connecticut and seeing my awesome brother, sister-in-law, and beautiful niece Skylar!
- Living with two of the funnest people ever
- Reeling in my first fish ever
- Picnic at Ryan dam
- Carly and Morten's beautiful wedding and dancing with my lovely Morgan family
- Watching my cousin kick butt and be beautiful at State "Distinguished Young Women"
- Eric Church :)
- Watching the stars on a ginormous mountain of dirt in the middle of nowhere with a lovely fellow :)
- State fair walks with my beautiful new friends Megan and Kaity!
- Random conversations with people at Target (usually over 60 or under 6)
- My Target family :)
- Getting paid every two weeks
- Swimming in a freezing waterfall with my bestie cousin!!
- Seeing momma and baby moose!
- Enjoying writing songs and playing on the lovely Ibanez big brother got me :)
- Midnight trip to the fish hatchery and Gibson Park
- Silly 4th of July evening
- Dance parties with Brookie and Cody and Riley while she quilts
- My new fence scar
- The feeling of joy that overwhelms me when I see my best friends I haven't seen in forever!
- You and I by Lady Gaga
- Getting blonde again!
- My walking trail
- Tody and Wiwey!!
- The beautiful acryllic nails that stayed on forever and then were a pain to take off!
- Blacklight bowling
- Gaining independence and strength to do my own thing and be happy on my own
- Mountain yoga with Lauren
- Having TWO closets to raid when I can't find something to wear (thanks Brookie :))
- Getting updates on my two little princesses!
- And then that person who I never would have met this summer if I didn't fly away from Sunburst. :)
So there ya have it folks! This list could have gone on for two months...(I really have had the lovliest summer)...but I thought I'd spare some of your time. I have been terrible about blogs this summer! Hopefully get one good one up though before my real life starts... as for now, peace and love!! :) <3
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Everyone should be happy today! :)
This blogger blog is 2 days overdue! And I'm warning you right now, this is cheesy and crazy. But those who don't mind me barely managing to make a point in the most corny way possible...read on! :)
On my way to Bozeman to visit my beautiful new niece on Monday, I had one of the most important "big philosophical moments" I think I've ever had. ...It began by my thoughts drowning out the KIIS xm radio I had on. Four months ago and the day before I turned 18, my gorgeous niece Skylar was born, and exactly four months later beautiful little Haylie came! I was obsessing over how amazing they are and how amazing it is that they have their whole lives before them, literally anything great can happen to them! They haven't hurt a soul, they haven't been angry, they haven't had to make any decisions they may or may not regret. I would do anything for these two little angels, I love them so much and they are so amazing!
...Thinking about the lives Skylar and Haylie have before them caused my thoughts to evolve to the life that I have lived so far. Until that moment, I hadn't really thought about how each event in my life has led to another and shaped me into the person I am today. It's crazy. Even the great memories that have been tainted by bitter feelings in the past have became something to smile about. People that I have encountered whether it be for hours, months, or years have made me a better person whether they realize it or not. Things I have done and decisions I have made...whatever feelings they caused, good or bad, have led me to be right here. And although things are not perfect, nor will they ever be, there is no place I would rather be.
...These thoughts about my past, and how even though it might have been not so pleasant at the time, it has caused me to be the happy girl I am today, then led me to a divine intervention...or something like that. (Those of you who are not religious, I am warning you I'm about to go there.) I turned off the radio and talked to God longer than I ever have in my life. As I talked to him I admired the beauty of the scary, winding interstate to Helena. I suddenly just felt good. Like no matter what happens to me in this life, I'm gonna be okay because of the people around me, the things I have learned, and because right then and there I felt God working in my life in an overwhelming way.
Anyways, I'm not trying to preach to anyone, or B.S. with this blog. I just wanted to share this happy feeling I have with anyone who wants it! Whether you are religious or not, life is good, but short. The days pass by just the same whether we enjoy them or not.
To my sister Brianna and brother-in-law Keelan, congrats on beautiful Haylie. She is so adorable and I love her so much! :)
To everyone else, have a sparkly, happy, lovely day!
<3
Friday, July 1, 2011
The Anatomy of a Wish (or Most of Them, Anyways)
It all starts with a witnessing of a single event. Or maybe a couple similar events.
For that girl wishing for a boyfriend it was watching an adorable couple hold hands in the mall.
For that boy wishing for bigger muscles it was watching all the girls swoon over the quarterback.
For that student wishing for a college degree it was seeing a successful man or woman talking on his or her cell phone wearing designer shoes and fancy glasses.
Or maybe it was none of those at all. Like I said, these are MOST wishes we are speaking of.
To make this a little more personal, let me use myself circa 2007. It was the summer before high school and I was at a choir camp with my best friend. We were two of the youngest people there, but the older ones were so nice and welcoming to us, we only felt out of place for the first day.
So that wish of mine before high school, to be the girl that everyone wanted to be around, started with watching a beautiful girl with brown eyes, curly blonde hair, and a guitar interact with everyone at the camp. I soon realized that everyone remembered everything about her from previous years at the camp, and those who didn't know her felt like her best friend after the next few days. She led sing a longs around the camp fire with her guitar decorated with colorful swirls, flowers, and designs she had painted on herself. All of the boys did everything they could to get around her and all of the girls came to her with questions and to feel like they mattered to someone.
This girl inspired me. I wished to be the girl everyone wanted to be around.
Then the wish becomes a possibility, and you focus on it and take actions toward it.
For the girl wishing for a boyfriend, it's being brave enough to go up and talk to boys she is interested in.
For the boy wishing for bigger muscles, it's putting on those gym shorts and walking into that weight room.
For the student wishing for a college degree, it's applying to every possible school and for every possible scholarship.
For me, it was squashing my fears of being rejected and walking up to strangers and talking to them. Of course, at first the strangers started out as males only, since girls intimidated me back then (and still sometimes do). But slowly but surely I became more comfortable with starting conversations with anyone I chose to.
I began this step at the tri-county fair in a town nearby. I was with two of my friends, discussing my "wish", when we decided to try to be bold that night. We were only fourteen, so bold was maybe asking a guy to buy us a snow cone, or to sit by us at the demolition derby. But we did it. I remember having a blast surrounded by people that I never thought I would be "cool" enough to even talk to. That night I wrote in my journal about how nice everyone was to me, and even mentioned a cute boy who was going to be a senior at my school who I had talked with. (Needless to say, that boy eventually became a boyfriend...) I had taken actions toward my wish.
After the wish becomes a possibility, it becomes a reality, whether it be for a day, a month, or five years.
So that girl wishing for a boyfriend? She's got him.
That boy wishing for bigger muscles? Now quarterback of the football team.
And that student wishing for a college degree? In college, on his or her way toward a PhD.
For me, once Freshman year started, my wish may have started to become a reality, or maybe it was just me coming out of my shell, making new friends. Whatever it was, I was happy and having a great time. I was invitied to parties by one of the nicest senior girls who became a good friend. I was trying to decide between TWO cute boys, and I felt like I had it all together. I stopped thinking less about that girl at choir camp and more about what I was going to do tomorrow, which friend I had to get a birthday present for, and "that boy."
Once the wish is a reality is where the real test is. It either sticks, or it doesn't. You either regret ever wanting it in the first place, or you're proud of the steps you've taken to get to where you're at.
So the girl with the boyfriend, the quarterback with big muscles, the college graduate? Not sure what happened to them.
But what happened to me?
Well I'm still trying to figure that out. I don't know if my wish ever came true. And if it did, I'm not sure if it stuck. But do I regret the wish?
Yeah, sometimes. Sometimes I want everyone to like me, and when someone doesn't, I feel crushed. I want to be everyone's friend but not everyone wants to be my friend. I look back on everything that happened my that first year of high school and I realize that it was a big part of shaping who I am today. Even though I sometimes may feel like that scared little girl without her momma at choir camp, I've gotten better at hiding that. My skin is thicker, my mind is smarter, and my heart is stronger.
Wishes. We all have them, and we all journey through their anatomy.
But I don't think I believe that you should be careful what you wish for. That's nonsense. Because every wish that you care enough to do something about leads you through a series of twists and turns, ups and downs, backs and forths. There is something to be learned from every wish, whether it sticks or not, you wish you hadn't wished it, or you don't. You learned.
For that girl wishing for a boyfriend it was watching an adorable couple hold hands in the mall.
For that boy wishing for bigger muscles it was watching all the girls swoon over the quarterback.
For that student wishing for a college degree it was seeing a successful man or woman talking on his or her cell phone wearing designer shoes and fancy glasses.
Or maybe it was none of those at all. Like I said, these are MOST wishes we are speaking of.
To make this a little more personal, let me use myself circa 2007. It was the summer before high school and I was at a choir camp with my best friend. We were two of the youngest people there, but the older ones were so nice and welcoming to us, we only felt out of place for the first day.
So that wish of mine before high school, to be the girl that everyone wanted to be around, started with watching a beautiful girl with brown eyes, curly blonde hair, and a guitar interact with everyone at the camp. I soon realized that everyone remembered everything about her from previous years at the camp, and those who didn't know her felt like her best friend after the next few days. She led sing a longs around the camp fire with her guitar decorated with colorful swirls, flowers, and designs she had painted on herself. All of the boys did everything they could to get around her and all of the girls came to her with questions and to feel like they mattered to someone.
This girl inspired me. I wished to be the girl everyone wanted to be around.
Then the wish becomes a possibility, and you focus on it and take actions toward it.
For the girl wishing for a boyfriend, it's being brave enough to go up and talk to boys she is interested in.
For the boy wishing for bigger muscles, it's putting on those gym shorts and walking into that weight room.
For the student wishing for a college degree, it's applying to every possible school and for every possible scholarship.
For me, it was squashing my fears of being rejected and walking up to strangers and talking to them. Of course, at first the strangers started out as males only, since girls intimidated me back then (and still sometimes do). But slowly but surely I became more comfortable with starting conversations with anyone I chose to.
I began this step at the tri-county fair in a town nearby. I was with two of my friends, discussing my "wish", when we decided to try to be bold that night. We were only fourteen, so bold was maybe asking a guy to buy us a snow cone, or to sit by us at the demolition derby. But we did it. I remember having a blast surrounded by people that I never thought I would be "cool" enough to even talk to. That night I wrote in my journal about how nice everyone was to me, and even mentioned a cute boy who was going to be a senior at my school who I had talked with. (Needless to say, that boy eventually became a boyfriend...) I had taken actions toward my wish.
After the wish becomes a possibility, it becomes a reality, whether it be for a day, a month, or five years.
So that girl wishing for a boyfriend? She's got him.
That boy wishing for bigger muscles? Now quarterback of the football team.
And that student wishing for a college degree? In college, on his or her way toward a PhD.
For me, once Freshman year started, my wish may have started to become a reality, or maybe it was just me coming out of my shell, making new friends. Whatever it was, I was happy and having a great time. I was invitied to parties by one of the nicest senior girls who became a good friend. I was trying to decide between TWO cute boys, and I felt like I had it all together. I stopped thinking less about that girl at choir camp and more about what I was going to do tomorrow, which friend I had to get a birthday present for, and "that boy."
Once the wish is a reality is where the real test is. It either sticks, or it doesn't. You either regret ever wanting it in the first place, or you're proud of the steps you've taken to get to where you're at.
So the girl with the boyfriend, the quarterback with big muscles, the college graduate? Not sure what happened to them.
But what happened to me?
Well I'm still trying to figure that out. I don't know if my wish ever came true. And if it did, I'm not sure if it stuck. But do I regret the wish?
Yeah, sometimes. Sometimes I want everyone to like me, and when someone doesn't, I feel crushed. I want to be everyone's friend but not everyone wants to be my friend. I look back on everything that happened my that first year of high school and I realize that it was a big part of shaping who I am today. Even though I sometimes may feel like that scared little girl without her momma at choir camp, I've gotten better at hiding that. My skin is thicker, my mind is smarter, and my heart is stronger.
Wishes. We all have them, and we all journey through their anatomy.
But I don't think I believe that you should be careful what you wish for. That's nonsense. Because every wish that you care enough to do something about leads you through a series of twists and turns, ups and downs, backs and forths. There is something to be learned from every wish, whether it sticks or not, you wish you hadn't wished it, or you don't. You learned.
Friday, June 24, 2011
Had to be there? And everything else that crossed my mind
Finally in my bed that I've slept in for the past eleven or so years! It feels good to be home for a short while, and I feel like it has helped me reflect a little.
So here is what the deal is: I think I always subconsciously want the thing that is the worst for me. I don't know why and I don't know how to fix it, but at least I am aware of it...right?
Last night I had the most perfect dream. I had what I have been wanting most, and it was better than I could have ever asked for! I don't get why my subconscious brain would do that! It had to have known that I would wake up feeling at a loss and maybe slightly hopeless I'm that particular situation.
Needless to say....I slept great in my very own bed! Just not too pleased with the waking up part.
Okay now: enough of serious blog posts! I have a story for you that happened a couple weeks ago!
Just bear with me on this...I promise there is a moral...:)
As many of you may know, I do not have perfect vision so every once in a while I will wear my glasses in place of my contacts (which I rarely take out...bad, I know). Although I love my brown glasses, I am working at target this summer and really wanted the option of wearing glasses to work...I had a black or maybe even red pair in mind.
I got my prescription and then got online with my mom, and we ordered two pair! Black and red and they were both cuter than anything!
I waited about two weeks for those glasses and was so excited to get them when they finally arrived at Brooke and Jeremy's house!
So I opened the packages and took out my contacts and slowly put the first pair (the black ones)on. I stepped a little further away from the mirror to get a good look at myself and realized two important things about them....my eyes were the size of a blue whale(imagine the fortune teller professor in the third Harry Potter), and I could not see anything past my hand.
Needless to say, the other pair had the same effet.
Moral of the story: when you order glasses online make sure to put a negative in front of your prescription....or you might receive binoculars, magnifying glasses, and your eyes will look scary and huge.
The end :)
So here is what the deal is: I think I always subconsciously want the thing that is the worst for me. I don't know why and I don't know how to fix it, but at least I am aware of it...right?
Last night I had the most perfect dream. I had what I have been wanting most, and it was better than I could have ever asked for! I don't get why my subconscious brain would do that! It had to have known that I would wake up feeling at a loss and maybe slightly hopeless I'm that particular situation.
Needless to say....I slept great in my very own bed! Just not too pleased with the waking up part.
Okay now: enough of serious blog posts! I have a story for you that happened a couple weeks ago!
Just bear with me on this...I promise there is a moral...:)
As many of you may know, I do not have perfect vision so every once in a while I will wear my glasses in place of my contacts (which I rarely take out...bad, I know). Although I love my brown glasses, I am working at target this summer and really wanted the option of wearing glasses to work...I had a black or maybe even red pair in mind.
I got my prescription and then got online with my mom, and we ordered two pair! Black and red and they were both cuter than anything!
I waited about two weeks for those glasses and was so excited to get them when they finally arrived at Brooke and Jeremy's house!
So I opened the packages and took out my contacts and slowly put the first pair (the black ones)on. I stepped a little further away from the mirror to get a good look at myself and realized two important things about them....my eyes were the size of a blue whale(imagine the fortune teller professor in the third Harry Potter), and I could not see anything past my hand.
Needless to say, the other pair had the same effet.
Moral of the story: when you order glasses online make sure to put a negative in front of your prescription....or you might receive binoculars, magnifying glasses, and your eyes will look scary and huge.
The end :)
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Still Searching...
After almost a month of living away from home...two weeks of work...and college orientation... I find myself still searching for the same answers I was looking for last month.
I love being with my sister and her husband. I love being around them and they always have something fun going on. But I just don't have my OWN thing ya know?
Where wiill I find it? When will I find it?
Will it be a person? Will it be a hobby?
I feel like if I don't find something soon I am going to go crazy.
Now don't get me wrong. I have a few potential things. But I don't know what to expect from anything and I don't know the direction anything is headed.
So sorry for the lack of posts (and happy energetic entertaining ones at that). I promise things will pick up soon.
They will.
Soon.
Hope everyone is having a happy, beautiful, watermeloney summer!
<3 :)
I love being with my sister and her husband. I love being around them and they always have something fun going on. But I just don't have my OWN thing ya know?
Where wiill I find it? When will I find it?
Will it be a person? Will it be a hobby?
I feel like if I don't find something soon I am going to go crazy.
Now don't get me wrong. I have a few potential things. But I don't know what to expect from anything and I don't know the direction anything is headed.
So sorry for the lack of posts (and happy energetic entertaining ones at that). I promise things will pick up soon.
They will.
Soon.
Hope everyone is having a happy, beautiful, watermeloney summer!
<3 :)
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Where does the world go now?
After having graduated from high school, moved out of the house, and started my new job within just one week, I find myself with just one thought replaying in my head:
Where do I go now?
This whole year there was something inside of me that thought that once high school was over and I was living somewhere different my life would suddenly become something glamorous, crazy, meaningful. I thought I would know exactly who I am, where I was going, and what I needed to do.
But my life really hasn't changed all that much. I still spend my weekend nights reading books or watching movies with my family. I still struggle with the self esteem issues, although I know they are stupid. I still feel like there has to be something more. I feel like I know less about who I am, where I'm going, and what I need to do.
Don't get me wrong: I'm so grateful for my life and the people in it. I love it and I love them. But I never understood the quote, "The more things seem to change, the more they stay the same," until now.
It's hard to explain it. I don't really know if my confusion is normal, or if I'm the only one who feels so unsure.
Call me melodramatic, but I just don't know what life wants me to do anymore. I just want something to happen. I want to meet new people. I want to spend time with unexpected people that I already know. I want to feel young and wild and free.
But I know I'll be okay and I know this will pass. ....Just keep swimmin', just keep swimmin', just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. :)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Colors and Jumping Salmon
How do I avoid unpacking from being gone for 10 days? By listening to Black Betty and playing angry birds of course!! I hate those green pigs. I want someone to write a Black Betty song about me. It will be called Red Ronnie and talk about how I look when I am sun burnt, embarrassed, or under infra red lighting.
I graduate in 6 days. Fiddlesticks! I'm not ready. I am a little bummed about certain people (or a certain single person in particular) who won't be there but that's life isn't it? I always just pictured him there when I pictured graduation and now I'm pretty sure I won't even see him ever again. But that's good...movin on to the next chapter of my life as just me, no extra people along for the ride. New people, new memories, new things to worry about.
Enough of this seriousness though!! Now I'd like to share with everyone that this summer there are a couple things I must do. They include (besides the obvious like work, being an auntie, and living with sissy): get the colored crayons bubbles and blow them, tie dye some clothing items of choice, revisit my many attempts at a handspring...I WILL do it!...,buy some lawn gnomes and flamingoes and put them in various people's yards, be a mall walker, do yoga in Brooke and Jeremy's front lawn at dawn, and recite some poetry or sing a song I wrote at a coffee shop open mic night.
ThAts gonna be lovelier than someone who has sparkly skin! Oh also Iight start a hula hooping club? Who wants to join? :)
Oh boy...I really must unpack my world and pull myself out of the quicksand pulling me down down down.
Bye :) <3
I graduate in 6 days. Fiddlesticks! I'm not ready. I am a little bummed about certain people (or a certain single person in particular) who won't be there but that's life isn't it? I always just pictured him there when I pictured graduation and now I'm pretty sure I won't even see him ever again. But that's good...movin on to the next chapter of my life as just me, no extra people along for the ride. New people, new memories, new things to worry about.
Enough of this seriousness though!! Now I'd like to share with everyone that this summer there are a couple things I must do. They include (besides the obvious like work, being an auntie, and living with sissy): get the colored crayons bubbles and blow them, tie dye some clothing items of choice, revisit my many attempts at a handspring...I WILL do it!...,buy some lawn gnomes and flamingoes and put them in various people's yards, be a mall walker, do yoga in Brooke and Jeremy's front lawn at dawn, and recite some poetry or sing a song I wrote at a coffee shop open mic night.
ThAts gonna be lovelier than someone who has sparkly skin! Oh also Iight start a hula hooping club? Who wants to join? :)
Oh boy...I really must unpack my world and pull myself out of the quicksand pulling me down down down.
Bye :) <3
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Greener Grass
And now, ladies and gentlemen...here comes the whirlwind finish for the rest of my high school life.
Tomorrow through Saturday: State Music Festival in Missoula :)
Sunday early morning through the next Saturday: International Science and Engineering Fair in Los Angeles!!
Next Sunday: Senior church service, go through entire room to prepare for packing.
Monday-Friday: Last week of school, the last volunteer projects of various clubs, finals, checking out, graduation decorating and preparation.
Friday: Awards night.
Saturday: GRADUATION! and Lock-in :)
Sunday: Recover from Saturday, start packing.
Monday: Finish packing.
Tuesday: Move
Wednesday: Start at my new job :)
I can't believe it. It's all happening so fast, I feel like I am barely keeping up. I feel like Scooby Doo and Shaggy...when they run from the monsters and move their little legs so fast and then realize they are running in place, getting nowhere. Well for me the monster is time...but it chases no matter what. So you do the best you can and enjoy every moment of your life because when you look back, it's short.
Anyways, I just thought I would give everyone a boring update on my life.
I'll be sending glimmering sunny vibes to everyone starting Sunday!
Peace and Love <3
Tomorrow through Saturday: State Music Festival in Missoula :)
Sunday early morning through the next Saturday: International Science and Engineering Fair in Los Angeles!!
Next Sunday: Senior church service, go through entire room to prepare for packing.
Monday-Friday: Last week of school, the last volunteer projects of various clubs, finals, checking out, graduation decorating and preparation.
Friday: Awards night.
Saturday: GRADUATION! and Lock-in :)
Sunday: Recover from Saturday, start packing.
Monday: Finish packing.
Tuesday: Move
Wednesday: Start at my new job :)
I can't believe it. It's all happening so fast, I feel like I am barely keeping up. I feel like Scooby Doo and Shaggy...when they run from the monsters and move their little legs so fast and then realize they are running in place, getting nowhere. Well for me the monster is time...but it chases no matter what. So you do the best you can and enjoy every moment of your life because when you look back, it's short.
Anyways, I just thought I would give everyone a boring update on my life.
I'll be sending glimmering sunny vibes to everyone starting Sunday!
Peace and Love <3
Monday, May 2, 2011
Seven
As I sit here sucking on this delightful grape jolly rancher sucker, I am trying to psychoanalyze myself and discover the hidden meaning behind my shameless procrastination.
So far, I haven't uncovered any meanings playing hide and go seek, however, I think I have a theory:
I truly do care about my grades and getting things done on time and all that jazz. However, I think I care about it so much, that something inside me knows that I will get it done, even if I have to pull an all nighter, pull it together in a short amount of time, or wake up at 4 in the morning to finish it. I know that I won't let myself not get things done...I am so confident that I will get them done that I think it is okay to just not do them while I can.
Too bad that is a terrible philosophy to have.
I need to change my ways of thinking...right here, right now, right on this blog post.
Here is my new philosophy:
Dear Me,
Unless you complete your to-do list RIGHT NOW, it will never get done. Your life will turn into an unsolved puzzle, a pig's pen, a cracked egg on the sidewalk. DO IT NOW.
Love,
Me
Too bad that is a terrible lie.
So far, I haven't uncovered any meanings playing hide and go seek, however, I think I have a theory:
I truly do care about my grades and getting things done on time and all that jazz. However, I think I care about it so much, that something inside me knows that I will get it done, even if I have to pull an all nighter, pull it together in a short amount of time, or wake up at 4 in the morning to finish it. I know that I won't let myself not get things done...I am so confident that I will get them done that I think it is okay to just not do them while I can.
Too bad that is a terrible philosophy to have.
I need to change my ways of thinking...right here, right now, right on this blog post.
Here is my new philosophy:
Dear Me,
Unless you complete your to-do list RIGHT NOW, it will never get done. Your life will turn into an unsolved puzzle, a pig's pen, a cracked egg on the sidewalk. DO IT NOW.
Love,
Me
Too bad that is a terrible lie.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Prom: Then and Now
I woke up at 7:30 this morning and a flood of memories came rushing through me. So I pulled out a notebook and started writing. It ended up reminding me of a blog post...so, although it makes me feel slightly vulnerable to share it, I decided that I would post it on here...enjoy!
Three years ago I woke up at this same hour, anxious for my first prom. Now here I am, trying to savor the day of my last.
That day I woke up and wandered downstairs, looking for something to pass the time. I settled on watching 13 Going on 30. I got my hair done in a beautiful Carrie Underwood half updo. Brooke, who was still in college, did my shimmery makeup. Then Momma and her helped tie me into my bronze pickup skirt dress. I looked in the mirror and was proud of my tanned, clear skin, gorgeous hair, beautiful dress, and glowing face. I couldn't wait for my boyfriend, whom I loved dearly, to come pick me up.
As he was finally getting near I slipped into my silver sparkle strappy heels. He arrived in a white tux with a corsage for me and a yellow rose for my mom. He kissed my head and told me how proud he was that I was his girl. We posed for pictures, and then we were off. I was so happy...he looked so good!
We went to a fancy restaurant, The Lighthouse, with another senior couple. I spilled some alfredo sauce on my dress, thankfully able to wipe it off with a cloth napkin. In the car on the way back to the high school he held my hand, as he always did, feeling the rhinestone embellishment at the edge of my long french manicure.
We got to the high school for pictures and walked through Grand March. Then he was crowned king! I was so proud of my tall and handsome boyfriend, and I couldn't believe out of all the girls in the world, he loved me! We danced and sang to each other all night. I particularly remember him smiling and shaking his head as I danced around him and sang Taylor Swift's "Our Song." When we weren't dancing we were sitting together off to the side of the dance floor, talking and savoring every moment together, for he would be graduating in less than a month.
After the dance we changed into more comfortable clothes and then went to a friend's house for a short while. But we were both falling asleep, so we went back to my house. We lay on the basement couch, just talking and laughing, and then he eventually fell asleep. I will never forget what I felt that night: dread about what was to come after he graduated, happiness and gratefulness for the present, and love for the boy sleeping (also snoring) beside me.
Looking back on who I was that first prom, I'm proud of what I've grown into for the last. Sure, I might not have a boyfriend or feel as justified to strut my stuff as I used to, but I have grown up.
I've learned to be strong and stand on my own two feet. I've learned how to be a better friend, I've dealt with heart break, and learned how to let go.
I'm not the innocent, naive, lovestruck 15 year old girl that I was three years ago. I am an independent, strong, just-as-happy-by-herself adult who knows exaclty who she is.
Three years ago I woke up at this same hour, anxious for my first prom. Now here I am, trying to savor the day of my last.
That day I woke up and wandered downstairs, looking for something to pass the time. I settled on watching 13 Going on 30. I got my hair done in a beautiful Carrie Underwood half updo. Brooke, who was still in college, did my shimmery makeup. Then Momma and her helped tie me into my bronze pickup skirt dress. I looked in the mirror and was proud of my tanned, clear skin, gorgeous hair, beautiful dress, and glowing face. I couldn't wait for my boyfriend, whom I loved dearly, to come pick me up.
As he was finally getting near I slipped into my silver sparkle strappy heels. He arrived in a white tux with a corsage for me and a yellow rose for my mom. He kissed my head and told me how proud he was that I was his girl. We posed for pictures, and then we were off. I was so happy...he looked so good!
We went to a fancy restaurant, The Lighthouse, with another senior couple. I spilled some alfredo sauce on my dress, thankfully able to wipe it off with a cloth napkin. In the car on the way back to the high school he held my hand, as he always did, feeling the rhinestone embellishment at the edge of my long french manicure.
We got to the high school for pictures and walked through Grand March. Then he was crowned king! I was so proud of my tall and handsome boyfriend, and I couldn't believe out of all the girls in the world, he loved me! We danced and sang to each other all night. I particularly remember him smiling and shaking his head as I danced around him and sang Taylor Swift's "Our Song." When we weren't dancing we were sitting together off to the side of the dance floor, talking and savoring every moment together, for he would be graduating in less than a month.
After the dance we changed into more comfortable clothes and then went to a friend's house for a short while. But we were both falling asleep, so we went back to my house. We lay on the basement couch, just talking and laughing, and then he eventually fell asleep. I will never forget what I felt that night: dread about what was to come after he graduated, happiness and gratefulness for the present, and love for the boy sleeping (also snoring) beside me.
Looking back on who I was that first prom, I'm proud of what I've grown into for the last. Sure, I might not have a boyfriend or feel as justified to strut my stuff as I used to, but I have grown up.
I've learned to be strong and stand on my own two feet. I've learned how to be a better friend, I've dealt with heart break, and learned how to let go.
I'm not the innocent, naive, lovestruck 15 year old girl that I was three years ago. I am an independent, strong, just-as-happy-by-herself adult who knows exaclty who she is.
So here's to Prom 2011.
Here's to the greatest friends anyone could ask for.
Here's to dancing the night away.
Here's to NEW memories.
Here's to knowing (and loving) who we are.
<3
Friday, April 29, 2011
The Greatest Woman I Know
Although most of you are probably expecting some random, deep blog or even a blog about how prom is tomorrow (:)) I am switching things up. Tonight I am going to write about my mom..
I don't think she realizes how many lives, young and old, she has touched. Being an aid in her classroom this year has allowed me to witness that first hand. Her desk is full of well-deserved "I love you Mrs. Gillund" notes, colorful drawings, and other results of the first grade creative mind. Even kids that have the most behavior problems come up to her randomly in the middle of the day to give her a hug and tell her how pretty she is or how much they loved her. Though she makes a difference in every one of her student's lives, and though they all completely adore her and her fun and kind teaching style, I have got to see first hand how she has touched one little girl's life. This little girl comes from a rough home, and although she is tiny and adorable, she has had many behavior issues. But throughout the year I have watched how my mom handled these problems, and how, slowly but surely, this little girl is developing a sense of right and wrong in which she has learned from my mom. I believe that if my mom had the chance to be her teacher until she graduated, that little girl would most definately become a model citizen.
My mom is a fantastic teacher. I've heard many cases where parents will wait to move from Sunburst just so their child can be taught by the infamous Mrs. Gillund. She is a truly one of a kind, enthusiastic, kind, patient, and compassionate teacher. She has given me the inspiration to continue my education in the field of Elementary Education, and I hope to be half as great a teacher as she is.
Not only is my mom a great teacher, but she is also a great friend. Though she devotes 99% of her time to her family, she would do anything for any one of her friends, no matter what. She has modeled for me how to be a great friend my whole life.
My momma is a great mom to my siblings and me. Whether it is showing up to events (no matter how pointless it may seem to us), helping us out financially, listening to us complain, giving us advice on how to deal with conflicts, or just holding us when we need to cry, if it wasn't for her, I don't think any of us would be the people we are today. I am very proud of my relationship with her by the fact that I tell her everything. Not many teenage girls are willing to share everything with their mothers. But that is how cool, fun, understanding, and kind my mom is. She and I have an almost constant banter that drives my dad nuts. But to us it just proves how alike, and close we are. She is the first one my sisters and me come to when we have happy news or when we need someone to help us through a tough time.
I could go on forever, but for now I will end with this. I thank God every day for the amazing mom that I have. She is kind to everyone, stronger than anyone I know, and a great influence on everyone around her. She is the greatest woman I know.
I love you, Momma. <3
I don't think she realizes how many lives, young and old, she has touched. Being an aid in her classroom this year has allowed me to witness that first hand. Her desk is full of well-deserved "I love you Mrs. Gillund" notes, colorful drawings, and other results of the first grade creative mind. Even kids that have the most behavior problems come up to her randomly in the middle of the day to give her a hug and tell her how pretty she is or how much they loved her. Though she makes a difference in every one of her student's lives, and though they all completely adore her and her fun and kind teaching style, I have got to see first hand how she has touched one little girl's life. This little girl comes from a rough home, and although she is tiny and adorable, she has had many behavior issues. But throughout the year I have watched how my mom handled these problems, and how, slowly but surely, this little girl is developing a sense of right and wrong in which she has learned from my mom. I believe that if my mom had the chance to be her teacher until she graduated, that little girl would most definately become a model citizen.
My mom is a fantastic teacher. I've heard many cases where parents will wait to move from Sunburst just so their child can be taught by the infamous Mrs. Gillund. She is a truly one of a kind, enthusiastic, kind, patient, and compassionate teacher. She has given me the inspiration to continue my education in the field of Elementary Education, and I hope to be half as great a teacher as she is.
Not only is my mom a great teacher, but she is also a great friend. Though she devotes 99% of her time to her family, she would do anything for any one of her friends, no matter what. She has modeled for me how to be a great friend my whole life.
My momma is a great mom to my siblings and me. Whether it is showing up to events (no matter how pointless it may seem to us), helping us out financially, listening to us complain, giving us advice on how to deal with conflicts, or just holding us when we need to cry, if it wasn't for her, I don't think any of us would be the people we are today. I am very proud of my relationship with her by the fact that I tell her everything. Not many teenage girls are willing to share everything with their mothers. But that is how cool, fun, understanding, and kind my mom is. She and I have an almost constant banter that drives my dad nuts. But to us it just proves how alike, and close we are. She is the first one my sisters and me come to when we have happy news or when we need someone to help us through a tough time.
I could go on forever, but for now I will end with this. I thank God every day for the amazing mom that I have. She is kind to everyone, stronger than anyone I know, and a great influence on everyone around her. She is the greatest woman I know.
I love you, Momma. <3
Monday, April 25, 2011
Avoidance and Stuff Like That
Low inspiration.
High expectations.
Why is it that just as my life is about to begin it feels as if I'm stuck on pause?
Fear not!
It will soon be gone, and I will be looking back to this waiting period as a peaceful, calming time before my life went on.
With sparkles in my eyes, fireworks in my heart, and butterflies in my stomach I will wait.
Life will go on.
<3 :)
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Copy Kitten
A. Age: 18
B. Bed size: Full
C. Chore you dislike: Dusting. It all comes back in like 30 seconds anyways...
D. Dogs: LOVE! I have some great dogs in my life. Andy and Bobby who are oldies but the sweetest mellowest dogs ever and I YUV THEM! Cody and Riley who are crazy and hyper and fun and affectionate and I YUV THEM! And Chance who is crazy and lovable and too big for his own good :) and I YUV HIM!
E. Essential start to your day: Lately it has been early morning workouts with Jacoba. I love spending the hours before school with her and the work out ladies who wear thongs over their spandex shorts. "Plyametric (spelling?) jumps now!....Lots of energy!"
F. Favorite color: Pink. But I don't like to hurt anyone's feelings. I do love all the other colors. Plus I love SPARKLES!
G. Gold or silver: Doesn't matter. Both are shiny and look beautiful with pretty much anything. It depends on what type of vibe I'm feeling. Gold is for my hippie sun goddess vibe and silver is for my classy beauty queen vibe. :P
H. Height: Welp...I'm not exactly sure. I keep telling myself 5'7" but I'm pretty sure I'm up to 5'8" now. Awesome...I love being tall...not.
I. Instruments you play(ed): Flutey flute. Pianoey piano. Guitarey guitar.
J. Job title: Procrastinator, avoider of work, senioritis victim.
K. Kids: Love them. Can't wait to see my beautiful niece Skylar soon and niece to be Haylie in July! Kisses to those little butterflies. <3
L. Live for ______: hyper moments with my family and beautiful friends. Meeting new people and getting a good vibe from them. Singing at the top of my lungs. That moment when one more thing in my life makes sense.
M. Most memorable moment: How. The heck. Am I supposed to choose that? Probably summers at the lake with sisters and cousins. The simple, happy times under a warm sun and fresh mountain air. Take me back there, anyone?
N. Nicknames: Ronnie, Ron, Ron Ron, Spatula :)
O. Overnight hospital stays: knock on my wooden door. none.
P. Pet peeves: People stating their opinion like its a fact. Wishy washy people who won't make a decision. Myself when I lose my pencils at school every five minutes.
Q. Quote from a movie: No, I could not think of one off the top of my head. Yes, I googled it. No, google does not have a very good data base for movie quotes. So yes, I will use a Superstar quote. "I would just like everyone to know that I am multi-talented, but today I have chosen to express myself through song."
S. Siblings: Courageous, musically-talented, kind, and so much like Dad it's not even funny- Roman
Intelligent, kind hearted, sensitive, gorgeous, and preggers (YAYYY!)- Brianna
Organized, relatable, caring, beautiful, life of the party, practical in a good way- Brooke
T. Time you wake up: It's been 5 a.m.....those work outs with Jacoba...fun but totally kill me :)
U. University attended: Not yet....but in about four months I will be attending Montana State University Bozeman! So scared but so excited :)
V. Vegetables: Only raw. Carrots. Cucumbers. Pickles. Cooked corn, mashed potatoes, steamed broccoli.
W. What makes you run late: I "dilly dally". Big time. I am a day dreamer and an avoider of annoying but simple tasks. (As we speak I am avoiding packing, photocopying a couple scholarships, and having my mom sign off on my guitar minutes...I suck)
X. X-rays you’ve had: Dental x-rays (NO WISDOM TEETH!!) and x-rays on my lung/chest area when I was being attacked by asthma in middle school/junior high era.
Y. Yummy food you make: I make a mean bowl of cinnamon toast crunch. Haha :)
Z. Zoo animal favorites: Dolphins! I also love seein the gorillas at the zoo cuz they are always just sittin around chomping on some paper or hiding behind it. Or pressed up against the glass staring at little babies. Gosh I love gorillas.
B. Bed size: Full
C. Chore you dislike: Dusting. It all comes back in like 30 seconds anyways...
D. Dogs: LOVE! I have some great dogs in my life. Andy and Bobby who are oldies but the sweetest mellowest dogs ever and I YUV THEM! Cody and Riley who are crazy and hyper and fun and affectionate and I YUV THEM! And Chance who is crazy and lovable and too big for his own good :) and I YUV HIM!
E. Essential start to your day: Lately it has been early morning workouts with Jacoba. I love spending the hours before school with her and the work out ladies who wear thongs over their spandex shorts. "Plyametric (spelling?) jumps now!....Lots of energy!"
F. Favorite color: Pink. But I don't like to hurt anyone's feelings. I do love all the other colors. Plus I love SPARKLES!
G. Gold or silver: Doesn't matter. Both are shiny and look beautiful with pretty much anything. It depends on what type of vibe I'm feeling. Gold is for my hippie sun goddess vibe and silver is for my classy beauty queen vibe. :P
H. Height: Welp...I'm not exactly sure. I keep telling myself 5'7" but I'm pretty sure I'm up to 5'8" now. Awesome...I love being tall...not.
I. Instruments you play(ed): Flutey flute. Pianoey piano. Guitarey guitar.
J. Job title: Procrastinator, avoider of work, senioritis victim.
K. Kids: Love them. Can't wait to see my beautiful niece Skylar soon and niece to be Haylie in July! Kisses to those little butterflies. <3
L. Live for ______: hyper moments with my family and beautiful friends. Meeting new people and getting a good vibe from them. Singing at the top of my lungs. That moment when one more thing in my life makes sense.
M. Most memorable moment: How. The heck. Am I supposed to choose that? Probably summers at the lake with sisters and cousins. The simple, happy times under a warm sun and fresh mountain air. Take me back there, anyone?
N. Nicknames: Ronnie, Ron, Ron Ron, Spatula :)
O. Overnight hospital stays: knock on my wooden door. none.
P. Pet peeves: People stating their opinion like its a fact. Wishy washy people who won't make a decision. Myself when I lose my pencils at school every five minutes.
Q. Quote from a movie: No, I could not think of one off the top of my head. Yes, I googled it. No, google does not have a very good data base for movie quotes. So yes, I will use a Superstar quote. "I would just like everyone to know that I am multi-talented, but today I have chosen to express myself through song."
S. Siblings: Courageous, musically-talented, kind, and so much like Dad it's not even funny- Roman
Intelligent, kind hearted, sensitive, gorgeous, and preggers (YAYYY!)- Brianna
Organized, relatable, caring, beautiful, life of the party, practical in a good way- Brooke
T. Time you wake up: It's been 5 a.m.....those work outs with Jacoba...fun but totally kill me :)
U. University attended: Not yet....but in about four months I will be attending Montana State University Bozeman! So scared but so excited :)
V. Vegetables: Only raw. Carrots. Cucumbers. Pickles. Cooked corn, mashed potatoes, steamed broccoli.
W. What makes you run late: I "dilly dally". Big time. I am a day dreamer and an avoider of annoying but simple tasks. (As we speak I am avoiding packing, photocopying a couple scholarships, and having my mom sign off on my guitar minutes...I suck)
X. X-rays you’ve had: Dental x-rays (NO WISDOM TEETH!!) and x-rays on my lung/chest area when I was being attacked by asthma in middle school/junior high era.
Y. Yummy food you make: I make a mean bowl of cinnamon toast crunch. Haha :)
Z. Zoo animal favorites: Dolphins! I also love seein the gorillas at the zoo cuz they are always just sittin around chomping on some paper or hiding behind it. Or pressed up against the glass staring at little babies. Gosh I love gorillas.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Happiness is Relative
A few of my favorite things.... :)
Notebook and sharpies...I heart writing...and pretty colors :)
This little light of mine!!! Yes I'm 18 and still sleep with a night light (sometimes) :)
I have TWO beautiful hula hoops! I love hula-ing
Graduation ring Momma just got me...love this very very much
Peace signs!!!
I have tons of makeup...and I love love love it :P
Victoria's secret sexy little things perfume...delightful!
AAAH NAIL POLISH! <3
My prom shoes. Sparkles <3 :)
My daddy's guitar. Beautiful sound and lovely to play :)
Momma's piano. I'm not the best pianist but that doesn't mean I can't plunk around! :)
Our candy drawer....enough said... :)
My iPod!!! And all the music on it :)
I made this sign a while ago with Brooke. Although I love the sign, it's the principle of the sign that I really love :)
Purple shiny zebra purse from Brianna :) so fabulous!
Anyways, hope everyone enjoyed a little look into my life :P
Happy Sunday!
<3
Sunday, April 10, 2011
I'm Mostly Secondary
"Have no fear for givin' in. Have no fear for givin' over. You better know that in the end it's better to say to much than never to say what you need to say again."
Although I am a big fan of his music and lyrics, I don't think John Mayer got it right with this one. First of all, how do you distinguish between something that COULD be said and something that NEEDS to be said? And then even when you figure that out, problems still oppose. Saying what you need to say sometimes can save a whole situation you are in, but I think most people are intelligent in the fact that if they are not saying something that they need to say it is (for the most part) for a good reason.
Take me, for example. There are a few important thoughts that have been crowding my head...one for the past four months, one for the past three, and one for the past two. But I can tell you right now that if I made those thoughts known it wouldn't change anything for the good at all.
Thought number one: This thought is about taking something that's decent in my life and making it a million times better. But saying this would risk losing the decent and then being left with nothing. My life is uneventful enough as it is...I don't need to lose one more (remotely) exciting aspect of my life. Vocalizing this thought also means tearing some walls down and being vulnerable and most likely getting hurt and probably causing a little drama. Which neither are ever a good time. So no, John Mayer, I will not say what I need to say.
Thought number two: This thought would not do any good. It's something that I would like to happen but is impossible. No changes will come out by saying this, except for the fact that school would be awkward and I would definately be teased and bothered. No great big amazing movie climax moment with an inspiring song playing in the background will result by stating this...so once again, no, John Mayer, I will not say what I need to say.
Thought number three: This thought is taking a good aspect of my life and changing it...but I still haven't figured out if it would be for the better or the worse. So stating this could be catastrophic for two reasons...if it changed for the worse then I would always be thinking, "Stupid John Mayer, why did I have to say that and screw everything up?", and also saying this could ruin the good aspect and I could be rejected and hurt...which as I have said before is not a unicorn ride under a sparkly rainbow. So for the third time, no, John Mayer, I will not say what I need to say.
I just don't think it's necessary. What if what you need to say will hurt someone? What if it ruins opportunities? What if saying it brings on new thoughts that "need" to be said, and then you say that and it makes things even worse?
If it doesn't change anything for the good, what's the point?
P.S. I am now the owner of a water filled purple sparkly hula hoop. :)
Although I am a big fan of his music and lyrics, I don't think John Mayer got it right with this one. First of all, how do you distinguish between something that COULD be said and something that NEEDS to be said? And then even when you figure that out, problems still oppose. Saying what you need to say sometimes can save a whole situation you are in, but I think most people are intelligent in the fact that if they are not saying something that they need to say it is (for the most part) for a good reason.
Take me, for example. There are a few important thoughts that have been crowding my head...one for the past four months, one for the past three, and one for the past two. But I can tell you right now that if I made those thoughts known it wouldn't change anything for the good at all.
Thought number one: This thought is about taking something that's decent in my life and making it a million times better. But saying this would risk losing the decent and then being left with nothing. My life is uneventful enough as it is...I don't need to lose one more (remotely) exciting aspect of my life. Vocalizing this thought also means tearing some walls down and being vulnerable and most likely getting hurt and probably causing a little drama. Which neither are ever a good time. So no, John Mayer, I will not say what I need to say.
Thought number two: This thought would not do any good. It's something that I would like to happen but is impossible. No changes will come out by saying this, except for the fact that school would be awkward and I would definately be teased and bothered. No great big amazing movie climax moment with an inspiring song playing in the background will result by stating this...so once again, no, John Mayer, I will not say what I need to say.
Thought number three: This thought is taking a good aspect of my life and changing it...but I still haven't figured out if it would be for the better or the worse. So stating this could be catastrophic for two reasons...if it changed for the worse then I would always be thinking, "Stupid John Mayer, why did I have to say that and screw everything up?", and also saying this could ruin the good aspect and I could be rejected and hurt...which as I have said before is not a unicorn ride under a sparkly rainbow. So for the third time, no, John Mayer, I will not say what I need to say.
I just don't think it's necessary. What if what you need to say will hurt someone? What if it ruins opportunities? What if saying it brings on new thoughts that "need" to be said, and then you say that and it makes things even worse?
If it doesn't change anything for the good, what's the point?
P.S. I am now the owner of a water filled purple sparkly hula hoop. :)
Friday, April 1, 2011
I'm a Fool!
So it's happened...
I've actually uncovered the perfect boy :)
This crazy month I have been to Salt Lake City, Great Falls, Missoula, Billings, Helena, and Calgary, and wouldn't ya know out of all those places I found one good one!
First off let me just say that he is extremely good looking. I don't know how I lucked out with getting someone who is so gorgeous!
He enjoys my eccentric and childish sense of humor, and he says his favorite thing about me is my quirky personality...who knew someone would actually be attracted to what leaves most people slowly backing away from me.
He plays guitar and he is an excellent singer. And he loves the same music as me...what many people describe as "preppy punk"...but not him. I don't have to tolerate ridiculous rap, boring blue grass, or jokey jazz. :)
Also, I never feel like I am bothering him. Which is rare! And I find myself smiling like a fool whenever he even crosses my mind. It's embarrassing.
He is completely selfless! I have to argue in order to make sure he gets what he wants. He insists on paying for everything, he won't say anything about himself until he has asked me at least a billion questions about my day.
He really makes me smile.
Well now that I've gone on and on about this boy let me tell you just one more thing about him...
He doesn't exist....
That's right, I just April Fooled you!
Did you really think that there was a boy like that? I'm pretty sure they aren't made like that anymore.
Don't get me wrong...this is not a list of "requirements" that I have for a boyfriend...just an example. Trust me, I'm not so stupid to expect that much from someone of the male species ;)
So, oh well, right? :) Someday someone will come and take me by surprise...
and until then, I'll enjoy my evenings alone watching chick flicks, reading silly novels, and eating too much candy.
Happy April Fool's day :)
I've actually uncovered the perfect boy :)
This crazy month I have been to Salt Lake City, Great Falls, Missoula, Billings, Helena, and Calgary, and wouldn't ya know out of all those places I found one good one!
First off let me just say that he is extremely good looking. I don't know how I lucked out with getting someone who is so gorgeous!
He enjoys my eccentric and childish sense of humor, and he says his favorite thing about me is my quirky personality...who knew someone would actually be attracted to what leaves most people slowly backing away from me.
He plays guitar and he is an excellent singer. And he loves the same music as me...what many people describe as "preppy punk"...but not him. I don't have to tolerate ridiculous rap, boring blue grass, or jokey jazz. :)
Also, I never feel like I am bothering him. Which is rare! And I find myself smiling like a fool whenever he even crosses my mind. It's embarrassing.
He is completely selfless! I have to argue in order to make sure he gets what he wants. He insists on paying for everything, he won't say anything about himself until he has asked me at least a billion questions about my day.
He really makes me smile.
Well now that I've gone on and on about this boy let me tell you just one more thing about him...
He doesn't exist....
That's right, I just April Fooled you!
Did you really think that there was a boy like that? I'm pretty sure they aren't made like that anymore.
Don't get me wrong...this is not a list of "requirements" that I have for a boyfriend...just an example. Trust me, I'm not so stupid to expect that much from someone of the male species ;)
So, oh well, right? :) Someday someone will come and take me by surprise...
and until then, I'll enjoy my evenings alone watching chick flicks, reading silly novels, and eating too much candy.
Happy April Fool's day :)
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
The Bridge Turned to Ash
So I know I've advertised this as a happy uplifting entertaining blog...but tonight is a post for deep thoughts.
My whole life I've been afraid to let go of things, people, and relationships. I hate saying goodbye, I hate being angry, I hate making decisions, and I hate it when people are mad at me. These reasons are why it has taken me so many long and testing trials to let go of the thing I needed out of my life most.
It's scary. When someone has been your best friend for your whole adoloescent life, when someone knows you better than anyone in the world, and when you have shared some of your deepest secrets and thoughts, greatest memories, and happiest moments with that someone, it's scary to let them go.
I know I'm kind of like the boy (or girl) who cried wolf (or "I'm finally letting go"), but this time it's real. Althouh I may have let go and walked away in the past, I have always left a bridge to be crossed in case minds were changed. But this time I set fire to the bridge. My eyes welled up, as I watched it burn, but then I felt a new strength in myself as I watched the flames turn to embers, the embers to ash, and the bridge collapse.
There's no way to get back to that place anymore. Even if I want to, I can't. The bridge has crumbled. There's nothing there. Now it's just me. With a toxic river with no crossing behind me. And sunshine, green grass, and a hope for new, better happiness and greater memories in my path.
So here I am. Just me. No bridges, no tears.
Just me :)
My whole life I've been afraid to let go of things, people, and relationships. I hate saying goodbye, I hate being angry, I hate making decisions, and I hate it when people are mad at me. These reasons are why it has taken me so many long and testing trials to let go of the thing I needed out of my life most.
It's scary. When someone has been your best friend for your whole adoloescent life, when someone knows you better than anyone in the world, and when you have shared some of your deepest secrets and thoughts, greatest memories, and happiest moments with that someone, it's scary to let them go.
I know I'm kind of like the boy (or girl) who cried wolf (or "I'm finally letting go"), but this time it's real. Althouh I may have let go and walked away in the past, I have always left a bridge to be crossed in case minds were changed. But this time I set fire to the bridge. My eyes welled up, as I watched it burn, but then I felt a new strength in myself as I watched the flames turn to embers, the embers to ash, and the bridge collapse.
There's no way to get back to that place anymore. Even if I want to, I can't. The bridge has crumbled. There's nothing there. Now it's just me. With a toxic river with no crossing behind me. And sunshine, green grass, and a hope for new, better happiness and greater memories in my path.
So here I am. Just me. No bridges, no tears.
Just me :)
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
Blow Out the Candles
In case none of you knew, it is in fact my birthday today :)
As I look back on even just the past few birthdays I've had, it's really not hard to see how I have changed over the years. I can see it in myself...I am growing up. And I really think I'm starting to find out who I am, and like who I am. Which is a big thing since I haven't graduated yet, I think.
So 18 is kind of a scary number. I've always downplayed my age because most of the people in my family are at least 6 years older than me...so I've never really felt it was a huge deal to turn a year older.
But 18...I'm allowing myself to feel like this really is a big number. Of course, I can vote now, can be arrested, and am "legal", but it's more than that to me. It's saying goodbye to the world I've known so well for 18 years now, depending less on my parents, relying more on myself. It's growing up. And that's kind of scary. But so exciting!
Just yesterday my brother and his wife had a baby girl! What an amazing birthday gift for me! I'm so happy for Roman and Jen, and I'm so excited about my beautiful new niece who I love so so much!
Also, on Friday...I found out that my sister's baby who is due in July is a girl! Haylie Marie James, I love you already and can't wait to spend so much time with you!
So anyways, thank you to all of the gorgeous people in my life for the birthday wishes and thoughts.
Here's to new life, and new beginnings! :)
Muah!
As I look back on even just the past few birthdays I've had, it's really not hard to see how I have changed over the years. I can see it in myself...I am growing up. And I really think I'm starting to find out who I am, and like who I am. Which is a big thing since I haven't graduated yet, I think.
So 18 is kind of a scary number. I've always downplayed my age because most of the people in my family are at least 6 years older than me...so I've never really felt it was a huge deal to turn a year older.
But 18...I'm allowing myself to feel like this really is a big number. Of course, I can vote now, can be arrested, and am "legal", but it's more than that to me. It's saying goodbye to the world I've known so well for 18 years now, depending less on my parents, relying more on myself. It's growing up. And that's kind of scary. But so exciting!
Just yesterday my brother and his wife had a baby girl! What an amazing birthday gift for me! I'm so happy for Roman and Jen, and I'm so excited about my beautiful new niece who I love so so much!
Also, on Friday...I found out that my sister's baby who is due in July is a girl! Haylie Marie James, I love you already and can't wait to spend so much time with you!
So anyways, thank you to all of the gorgeous people in my life for the birthday wishes and thoughts.
Here's to new life, and new beginnings! :)
Muah!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Once Upon a Time I Was a Piece of Tin Foil
In 1.5 hours I will be off to a faraway land named Salt Lake City!
I am excited about this because:
I am excited about this because:
1. I am going with some of the most fun people ever!
2. We will have a wee bit of free time to swim and such :)
3. We are going to the GATEWAY MALL! Yeah yeah!
4. I am sick of below zero weather.
5. Sunburst is a slug these days.
So...yes, this will be a sparkle of a time.
I have a black flower in my hair today....which is kind of an oxymoronish...black....flower....?
Anyways, Pokey Scratch has not left the building yet...and he has brought along a friend who is a miniature horse named Congested Run, who is practicing his leaps and racing in my nasal/sinus cavities.
An interesting thing happened to me last night. And I am proud of myself with the way I handled it. Life tests you sometimes, and I think it's important to stand your ground even when you don't really want to.
One more thing. I have had a St. Patrick's day rap that I made up with my friends in sixth grade stuck in my head all morning.
Yo yo yo, we're the fab four
And we've come a knockin on your door
To tell you today it's St. Patrick's Day
Hey, hey, hey, hey
We're painting the town green, like a saint
Doing good deeds for everyone till they faint
We're sitting on the blarney stone eating colcannon
Yum colcannon, yum, yum, colcannon
"Something something something I don't remember what comes next which has been bothering me"
Who let the leprechaun out?
Who, who, who, who?
One, two, three, four CLOVERS
We're lucky...and we're gonna get a little bit funky
Boom, boom boom. Boom boom boom boom BOOM
At the end of the rainbow, there's always gold, and now we're putting you on hold.
Now we're back, do ya like it like that?
Cuz we're rappin like St. Pat.
Here is a cookie
A treat for you
And now we know you'll say thank you.
The end.
Have a sparkleicious week :)
<3
Monday, February 28, 2011
The Sicky Blog
There is a porcupine living in my throat. His name is Pokey Scratch. He likes to dance around and do acrobatic tricks in there. Although I support his dreams of dancing and gymnastics, I would appreciate it if he would pursue his dreams elsewhere.
Do you hear me, Pokey Scratch? Go away please.
Love,
Me :)
Do you hear me, Pokey Scratch? Go away please.
Love,
Me :)
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Just a Little Kibble Bit of Information
I am doing scholarships!!!!
So...not a long blog here...but I just wanted to share a fun fact with everyone.
Every single pen in my room is out of ink. Except for one.
So.
I am filling out scholarships with a polka dot jumbo pen...about a foot long.
How professional of me!
So...not a long blog here...but I just wanted to share a fun fact with everyone.
Every single pen in my room is out of ink. Except for one.
So.
I am filling out scholarships with a polka dot jumbo pen...about a foot long.
How professional of me!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Surprises Don't Hide Forever
Life has been catching me by surprise these days....for example.
Just as I was starting this blog, I was startled by a blaring "CONGRATULATIONS, YOU WON!" audio pop up add. It made my heart jump.
This morning I happened to look down at my hand and saw blood coming out of a cut on my knuckler knuck. I don't know where it came from. (The cut....not the blood.)
I creepily decided to add an attractive member of the opposite sex on facebook who I've never talked to in my life. I mostly clicked the "add as friend" button to humor myself. However, he confirmed the request.
Yep, what a surprising life I lead. Be jealous, please.
P.S. I apologize, to the invisible avid readers of my blog, for the decrease in entertaining blogs. It is due to a combination of stupid annoying weather, lack of inspiration (or any action in my life, for that matter), and a deprivation of motivation.
<3 you, avids. bye :)
Just as I was starting this blog, I was startled by a blaring "CONGRATULATIONS, YOU WON!" audio pop up add. It made my heart jump.
This morning I happened to look down at my hand and saw blood coming out of a cut on my knuckler knuck. I don't know where it came from. (The cut....not the blood.)
I creepily decided to add an attractive member of the opposite sex on facebook who I've never talked to in my life. I mostly clicked the "add as friend" button to humor myself. However, he confirmed the request.
Yep, what a surprising life I lead. Be jealous, please.
P.S. I apologize, to the invisible avid readers of my blog, for the decrease in entertaining blogs. It is due to a combination of stupid annoying weather, lack of inspiration (or any action in my life, for that matter), and a deprivation of motivation.
<3 you, avids. bye :)
Monday, February 14, 2011
Purple....Murple?Shurple?Durple?Burple?
Happy Valentine's Day to everyone reading this! Consider this my personal valentine to YOU!
Yes, it is 5:46 am and I am awake, blogging. The early rising could be due to 3 things:
1. I dreamed that I wrote a terrible and not entertaining blog about Justin Bieber...I awoke early so I could redeem my blogging reputation.
2. I may or may not have eaten a giniormous scoop of marshmallow cream last night...causing some chemical inbalance in my brain....causing me to wake up super early.
3. I didn't do any of my homework this weekend so I had to wake up at 5 am to do it.
Although each one of these things are true, the third is the most influential reason as to why I am up at now 5:49 am blogging. Procrastination seems to be my reason for a lot of things these days. No no motivation.
ANNYWAYS, back on track, to the pencil tip point....
Yes, it is 5:46 am and I am awake, blogging. The early rising could be due to 3 things:
1. I dreamed that I wrote a terrible and not entertaining blog about Justin Bieber...I awoke early so I could redeem my blogging reputation.
2. I may or may not have eaten a giniormous scoop of marshmallow cream last night...causing some chemical inbalance in my brain....causing me to wake up super early.
3. I didn't do any of my homework this weekend so I had to wake up at 5 am to do it.
Although each one of these things are true, the third is the most influential reason as to why I am up at now 5:49 am blogging. Procrastination seems to be my reason for a lot of things these days. No no motivation.
ANNYWAYS, back on track, to the pencil tip point....
Violets aren't blue,
They really are purple,
But I'm pretty sure they did it,
Because nothing rhymes with purple.
It's MONDAY!
Here's what I love about Mondays: ............ ............................. ................................................................ ........................................well....now that I rack my brain for things to love about Mondays, I'm not coming up with much. But maybe something out of the ordinary will happen today since it is Valentine's Day as well as Monday. I won't hold my breath, however; blue face is not flattering on me.
Alright well, no point to this little blogster here, but hopefully it was entertaining enough to be a sufficient valentine to anyone who reads this.
Tell someone you love them today....even if it's your cat....or a box of chocolates....or hypothetical blog readers.
I love you.
:) Tata.
P.S. Today you really should have a cupcake.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Find the Destination
After a foggy January and a questionable first week of February, I have found inspiration for yet another blog.
Some people give off a sense of happiness, 24/7/365. It makes you wonder what they do, what their lives are like, who the people in their life are. Well....I think I have those people figured out. I don't think its about what they do, what their lives are like, or who the people in their life are. I think it's about who they are.
Pushing through hard times is like going on a really long hike... It sucks, and you want to give up. But you know you can't. You can't turn around cuz you'll just be back to where you started, with regret to add to your already heavy backpack. You can't stop because you know eventually you'll have to move forward anyways. So you just keep going, even though it sucks. But then you get to the destination, the beautiful lake, or the gorgeous glacier, or in the metaphoric case, happiness. And the struggle wasn't so bad...in fact, you may even look back thinking it was worth it. I've been on a hike for a while now...I have taken a few stops on the hike, thinking that was the destination, but then seeing that I need to keep pushing through because there is gonna be an even more beautiful destination waiting for me when all of this is over.
Those happy people are successful hikers. They are able to push through the struggle because they know what's waiting ahead of them.
Don't let the struggles of yesterday affect your judgements today and your relationships of tomorrow.
Life is a hike. Don't give up. Your destination is waiting just around the bend. :)
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Pennies Nickels Dimes and Quarters
It's intriguing to me how quickly things can change so drastically. One minute you're a depressed sloth hanging upside down in the rainforest, the next, you're a confused moth flying towards a light you know is going to burn you, and the next, you're a woodpecker, pecking, pecking, pecking at something with gusto, and determination... not caring about the repetition or how long it takes.
Of course changes are going to change certain things about you. I.E. your motivation levels, happiness levels, intellect levels, and tolerance levels.
But you really know who you are when changes don't change your opinions on things, your general outlook on life, and how you treat the world around you.
I still haven't really figured myself out yet. Everytime something changes I get an alert in my brain that I need to update the software up there. But I think that's okay...that changes still change me a little. I don't think I've had enough changes to know enough about myself....
With each alteration of my life, and each flip flopper that comes my way, I learn a little more, have more to reflect on, and take a little less time to update my brain's software.
You can spend your whole life waiting for change but nothing will ever matter if you can't change it all yourself.
Change.....cha-ching!
Oh yes, how things change.
But you really know who you are when changes don't change your opinions on things, your general outlook on life, and how you treat the world around you.
I still haven't really figured myself out yet. Everytime something changes I get an alert in my brain that I need to update the software up there. But I think that's okay...that changes still change me a little. I don't think I've had enough changes to know enough about myself....
With each alteration of my life, and each flip flopper that comes my way, I learn a little more, have more to reflect on, and take a little less time to update my brain's software.
You can spend your whole life waiting for change but nothing will ever matter if you can't change it all yourself.
Change.....cha-ching!
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Someone hand me an entertaniment sharpener
Well, it has been quite some time since I have last blogged. So here we go again!
Blog:
I have been pondering the art of confusion for the past week now. And yes, I did say art.
Blog:
I have been pondering the art of confusion for the past week now. And yes, I did say art.
I have come to the conclusion
That confusion
Is merely not knowing
What is going
On.
Colored Hello Kitty and Rapunzel with a brand new box of 120 beautiful color crayons today.
And I have some kind of lovely new clothing items to wear this week.
So...yeah, that was a really not entertaining blog post, and I apologize for my lack of entertainment skills at the moment.
Tomorrow...we will meet again. :)
Peace and blessings.
The end. <3
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